Friday, 24 August 2012

New stuff

Oh I am really happy.

I have had a great couple of weeks, with a minor scare in the middle.

It started like this:

I want to be blonde.

So I went to my hairdresser and got my hair highlighted. It was the first time I had had him do it as the girl I usually have has left. I say 'usually' in a loose way because I am the kind of person who has one hair cut a year.

I had a full head of highlights and a cut and because there wasn't enough time to blow dry it, I came home with wet hair. No probs. I live in a rural place and that kind of thing is accepted. They also are of the opinion that we will only get home, wash it and blow dry it ourselves anyway... that's the folk around here for you - I am a 'foreginer' remember.

I got home and thought I would just let it dry natural and bummed around on the computer for a bit. DS walks in from a mates house and yells "What have you done?!?!?!" I go to the mirror and - NO JOKE - I am as grey as my great grandmother.

The highlights were pure white. I was stunned a bit, recovered and grabbed my car keys. I drove to tesco and grabbed a bottle of my usual blonde colour (I have been au-naturale dark blonde for some time though) called Helsinki by Loreal.

Got home, added the jollop and waited. Took it off, washed it, dried it and was gulping back tears.

It was now blue where the white was, and orange where the dark blonde original was.

So I phoned my Mum for advice. She suggested getting a dark or beige blonde and putting that one and then letting it fade.

I went to the chemist in the village and grabbed medium blonde and dark blonde just in case. I put the Dark blonde on and all the palaver that follows... Once it was dry I was gutted. It was darker than my own natural hair colour, and a kind of auburn/reddy colour on the parting and crown area on the top of my head. I should have gone for the lighter one :-(

Mum was out so this was dissolving into a nightmare situation. I googled. I found a product called Colour B 4 which basically strips the colour you just put on out of your hair.

They had one at tescos. We drove there, DH and I, and grabbed a bottle of that, a bottle of Lightest Ash Blonde and a dark brown hair dye.

My reasoning was that after the stripper, I was going to try and get it blonde again, but if all else failed I could go brown!

The stripper scared the total shit out of me

It went day-glo yellow where the white bits were and violent orange on my natural.

I looked like I had been tangoed!

After all that, and at 11pm I rang mum saying we were good to go for ash blonde. She suggested I put it on and after 5 minutes have a look and see if it was a shade that I could live with... if not then keep checking until I was. I liked the colour at 5 minutes so we washed it off and it had neutralised the violence and toned the rest.

Its not quite what I wanted... which was golden honey coloured hair... but it was blonde.

All night and most of the next day my head ached and felt hot. It was as sore as a slapped bum. I had blisters the next day on the top of my head and I was just glad the hair was still hanging in there.

I am going to give it another week or so and then put a helsinki on it again and tone it to the right blonde as this is really not what I wanted... its still mildly orange on the top and the only way to solve that is to bleach it further. ( the photos seems absolutely fine, but orange is there trust me!)

I did this because Darling Husband said he loved it when I was blonde. I was blonde when I met him, and was blonde for many years via loreal and being darker these last few years I haven't particularly enjoyed enjoyed either.

I countered with, I loved you WITH hair... but we just giggled and I succumbed to the bottle. I think he would just love it if I had the red lipstick and stilettos to go with it!! Perve.

So I am happy with my new shade and then I went out looking at cars.

I went to have a LOOK. Just have a few test drives of different cars and see which one I liked and felt safe and comfortable in. We didn't intend to by one just yet as we still haven't finished paying Mum back for DH's car. Our last payment to her is 1st October. His car was a bit of a treat and they wanted us to have it, so they said get it and then pay us back. We have paid them nearly £300 a month so that we get rid of the debt in a year and that's worked well.

It also showed us that we could easily afford to have a new car over 5 year finance because we would pay less that £300!! So we decided that we would get a new car for me, as mine poor old nag is bandaged up and on morphine daily. I was intending to get the new one some time in October but...

I came across this LOVELY new stallion of a horse. I tried out a load of cars on Wednesday and I just loved this one.

It has just about everything I am never going to use on it - like 6 speed gear box (?!?!) and cruise control HAHA!

My stipulations for the new horse were these: Cheap tax, iPod Connection, Diesel, As new as possible, big enough for a growing teenage monster + friends and assorted paraphanalia.

I didnt care what it was, what colour or any of that shit.

This is a Kia Cee'd 2 EcoDynamics which is 6 months old. It's perfect.

The payments are just £225 a month, so I kind of feel like I have got a brand new car AND a reduction in my monthly payments!! I feel quids in :-)

So I signed on the dotted and I pick it up on Friday 31st August - the day after our 15th Wedding Anniversary which I think is just lovely! Its like the best present ever.

I went to tesco after this, and I was just grabbing a few bits when I spotted this lovely dress. I loved it, but I didn't try it on because the changing rooms were closed. I grabbed what I thought looked my size and thought I would just take it back if it looked rubbish.

It looks ACE!

Phil took this with my iPhone and doesn't know how to use the focus, but you get the idea. I love it and I feel like I am starting to get somewhere with this blubber girls!! I feel like sunshine when I wear it... I haven't had that feeling very much in my life. It kind of doesn't matter what I look like to others, but I just feel a billion quid wearing it ya know?

So wearing my new dress and hair I went for an interview for a position as a Music Teacher at the local Academy High School. Its a strange job because I won't actually work there, but in the 'feeder primary schools' giving piano and theory of music tuition to the kids there so that they get the opportunity to take it further in senior schools. I think I will have 2 schools to start with and then that will increase to 4 as I develop the course.

This will be the best job ever because I don't have to drive around the world doing 4 lessons in the time it takes to do 12 - and nor do I have to buy music, enter them for exams or deal with fussy parents!

I got the job! The director of the school said he had decided 20 seconds after meeting me which was such a lovely thing to say!

So I have a LOT of new stuff!

This morning I was given yet another beautiful gift of 104kgs on the scales!!!!!!!!!! That's probably the best gift ever! I am now at the lowest I got with my band before it broke. I am also only 6kgs heavier that both my husband and my lowest weight ever!!!!

The title of my blog has always been Weightloss Expedition, and I think my graph shows the mountains peaks and troughs of that trial. But at the moment, thankfully, I am free falling down the side riding on the waves of an avalanche - hopefully back to base camp and finish this bitch of a journey!!  

I hope you are all having fabulous things happen to you all, and if not then believe that they will happen! My husband said this morning we've had the "For Poorer" and we've had the "For sickness" bit of our vows and now we want the rest :-)

Sunday, 12 August 2012


Nearly killed myself yesterday at the gym. I thought I would have a go at the cross trainer now I have lost a bit of bulge.

I had already done 10 minutes on the treadmill doing my usual random hills at level 9 when i decided this. So I did another 5 minutes to gauge the calorie burn. I burned 46 calories in 5 minutes on the treadmill.

I hopped off and jumped onto a cross trainer. I set it at the lowest level and gave it a whirl. Nightmare. I hate the bloody things. I am sure they are designed by Satan personally for me. Anyway, I was going to do 15 minutes on there, but I pushed myself beyond all my physical strength to do 5!

In 5 minutes on Level 0 (AKA Level 'Sheer Hell') I burned 44 cals.

Bugger that then!!

I went back to the old faithful and did 1 hour on there. I burned 540 in that hour. I had also burned the 44 from the torture machine, and 140 before that so in total it was  724!!!!!!!

Oh man that was the maddest session ever! But, As I had over indulged the previous day by about 200 cals, and I was out to a BBQ that evening, I thought that I should do a bit more.

Its good to make plans, but for future reference, its probably easier to just not eat so much!

Have a good weekend all.

On a happier note, I am shit hot at growing Orchids.

They are so beautiful this year - check em out!

Geoffrey the flower girl... he hates it when we are outside and he's not allowed :-)

Also, This is a photo of a pair of trousers that I LOVE! I cant do them up right now, but I will try them on a regular intervals until I can! I think I wore them when I was at my thinnest, so that will be a great achievement when I can do them up again!!

A couple of months ago I put them away in the drawer because I couldnt actually get them on at all!! So we already have a semi achievement in the fact I can pull em up! LOL

Friday, 10 August 2012


Yes, the 105kgs are here...

I hardly registered that I was in the 106's as they were gone in a flash!

How is that possible that some numbers stick around for ages, but others fly by and you can hardly remember them? Weird.

Anyway, yesterday I was 105.9kgs and today I am safely in the middle at 105.6kgs.

I really hope that they wont be around long either and I could possible be in the 104's by the end of next week.

I am super charged and so excited by the weightloss that I can hardly think of anything else, which is very very VERY good right now.

These are my new gym trainers. They are the ugliest trainers I have ever seen. They are covered in ziggy zaggy flashy blues, silver and blacks all busy busy and horrible. They are Men's too as I am a 9 and you simply cant buy Women's trainers above an 8 in a shop - you need to get them online and I need to try them on right? it just sucks in England if you have amazonian feet and happen to be a woman. (as a side line - it might also be that I live in the back of beyond!)

I would NEVER have bought them in a zillion years had they not been the lightest, lighter than fluffy marshmallow, comfy squidgy soled beauties that they are!!

So, they get to come with me each time I work out and I love them!

I am in good solid gym routine of Monday, Wednesday, Friday and the occasional Saturday. Its working for sure. Since I restarted the gym at the beginning of July I have been shifting a lot more fat from me carcass.

When I am on that treadmill listening to pumping tunes - personally selected for getting me going and that have kind of inspirational words in there too - I visualise myself on holiday at Xmas. I am wearing a red bikini and I don't give a SHIT!

I am just 1 stone heavier than my lowest weight ever and I can freaking smell it baby!!!!!!!!

It seemed a million miles away. I never thought it would be within reach again ever, but here it is... just 8kgs away if that.

We are not just going away at Xmas... there is a small interim goal in 7th October. Mum and Dad have paid for us to go on a 4 day break to Majorca! That's only 8 weeks away, so you never know, I could be at my lowest ever by then!! That would be so awesome.

I don't know if we will see Mum and Dad before we go, so when they next see me I will be a lot slimmer than I was! That will please them as they know I am really trying hard. I am already 3kgs lower than when I saw them last!

But I don't want to get bogged down with thinking too far ahead. Its important for me to have my future image in my head, but not to think to definitively about when that will be.

I think sometimes we focus on the end goal and its too massive to contemplate and then we get disheartened. I thank Linda (my guru) for helping me to see that its a weekly competition with myself... My aim is 1kg and I am stoke if I reach that, and not actually too worried if its only half a kg as it still seems like a massive achievement.

I am driven, and feel empowered to get my goal and slam it home. This is a very very big first in my life as even when I had my band initially all those years ago I never felt like this. It was never me. It was never me physically changing and doing something myself... it was the band doing it in spite of me!

Even when I was at slimmingworld the first couple of years back in 2005... I would eat shit and then wonder why I had gained. Then on weeks where I hadn't eaten so much shit, but still actually eaten shit I would lose... this just baffled me further! I didn't at any time think I had to get it together. I, me, myself, personal. It was just like I was in a bubble being bounced around by my cravings.

Since May my cravings have changed. I crave my new body like I can hardly breathe. I crave how good I will feel being able to do stuff. I crave feeling 'normal' and crave people treating me better.

I am absolutely loving the comments I am getting about losing weight. I have lost over 16kgs now and its starting to show. The first 8 or so where quite slowly won, so no one really noticed but these last 8 have come off in a matter of months and people who haven't seen me since May are like "WOW!" which is the best feeling ever.

I don't even feel like I am on a diet. Its the BEST diet in the world.

I mean look at this stuff!! this was my food the other day...

This is 1500 calories of food.

2 slices of thick white bread with 1 whole sausage of liver and bacon pate.
1 large bowl of salad with watercress, spinach, rocket, lettuce leaves, tomato, onions and avocado.
1 home made salad dressing - 1tbsp olive oil, 1 tbsp honey, 1 tbsp white wine vinegar
1 whole punnet of strawberries (350g the big punnets!) and 150mls of real full fat single cream
2 - yes 2 - Dairy Milk chocolate bars
2 or 3 gin and tonics for the evenings wind down (30ml measures)

Now, seriously does that sound diet to you? I could have had more but I was in a chocolate day so 'spent' 410 calories on chocolate. I could easily had another round of sarnies or another meal!

However... I could NOT NEVER NO HOW think I could have done this (or be doing this) without the band. I dont feel hungry at all and that is the single biggest thing to get me through.

My mother decided to give the Under BMR diet a go and she says although she has lost 6 ponds in so many weeks (and not fat anyway), she is starving all the time. She has to eat 980 a day and is struggling.

I eat 1500 a day and its a breeeeeeeze.

All I wish, and my only regret, is that I didn't cop on to this earlier. Thank You Jonathan Vernon Smith and BBC 3 Counties Radio as I seriously think you saved my life!

And of course, thank you all for sticking by me and listening to 5 years of whingeing on.

Another evening this was my dinner... Pepperoni Pizza Pie, green salad and dressing and a whole punnet of strawberries and a tub of Greek Yoghurt. My 2 shots of gin goes down a treat - even though it does sound worse switching wine for gin... (sounds like a slippery slope right?) but I have slashed my weekly alcohol units beyond belief. Instead of drinking 2 or 3 bottles of wine per week (18-27 units which is above the UK guidelines) I now how 14 or less, which is well within! Brilliant!


Sunday, 5 August 2012


Updated Photos from September 2016

This section has not been updated since January 2013.
I will update this Photo gallery each month. Please bear in mind that I put back on ALL my lost weight PLUS another 21lbs - 1st 7lbs - 9.5kg in the last 3 years.
These photos start with my pre "Band to RNY Bypass" shots weighing 
124kgs - 273lbs - 19stone 7lbs
5th September 2016 - 124kgs

25th September 2016 - 115kgs 
16th October 2016 - 110kgs


N.B - 1.10.2010 - I have decided to re-start this photolog as it did not reflect my journey at all at the present moment in time. The first photo is of my initial surgery on 14th February 2007 and the following 3 photos were taken today, 1st October 2010 - approximately 3 and a half years after then. I am currently 17 pounds heavier than I was when I had my surgery. This however marks the start of my new Journey. Thank you

15th February 2007

Day after Surgery

Weight 18 Stone (252 lbs) 114.3kgs

BELOW: 1st October 2010

BELOW: 10th March 2011

116.7kgs - Down 5kgs

BELOW: 29th MAY 2011 112.9kgs - Down 10kgs

BELOW: 4th August 2012 - 106.2kgs (DOWN 15kgs)
AUGUST NOTES: I am not sure I can see a difference other than the fact that the line of my knickers seems to be now covering my belly button and has gradually krept up over the it through the set of photos... this must mean that my belly is diminishing. I also think my bum looks less sticking out/back less arched so thats good too. My bra is also not cutting into my side so much and the roll of fat on my left hand side looks gone completely... although it looks like I am leaning on my right leg although I was unaware of this... My legs look a little less doughy too... I dunno. roll on the next few shots - that will be at 20kgs down - 102kgs! Note to self... DH must stand level with the dining room wall!

BELOW: 18th January 2013 - 96.6kgs (DOWN 25kgs)

Thursday, 2 August 2012


I am going through an unbelievable amount of personal stress right now, and I just wanted to tell the world that I am proud of myself for not falling off the wagon and plunging head first into a swimmingpool of junk foods!

Trust me it's been hard.

I may or may not share the issue that we are dealing with... its the worst thing a mother could face to be honest so possibly not. Not until I am sure its ok again... if it will ever be.

But this week I lost 2 pounds bringing me to 106.5kgs which is awesome. I am still with the programme.

Sorry for the previous repost of my weight record, but as I update it and it was published in 2007 I thought I would refresh it.

Peace, love and hug your kids hard x

Wednesday, 1 August 2012


This is a record of my weightloss since beginning my Weightloss Expedition in 2005 when I weighed in at Slimmingworld at 18 stone 12 and a half pounds (264.5lbs).
I was banded in February 2007 weighing 18 stone (252lbs) exactly.

For several reasons my band journey needed restarting. 
I restarted my Gastric Band Journey on 1st October 2010 weighing 
19stone 3lbs - 269lbs - 122kgs  
I now weigh:

17 JANUARY 2013 - 96.6kgs (15 stone 3lbs or 213lbs)

07 SEPTEMBER 2012 - 102.3kgs (16 stone 1.5lbs or 225.5lbs)

01 AUGUST 2012 - 106.5kgs (16 stone 11 or  235lbs)

24 MAY 12 - 111.6kgs

1 MAY 2012 - 115.7 Re-Joined slimmingworld for accountability after radio show.
04 MARCH 2012 - 112.8kgs
01 OCTOBER 2011 - 111.0kgs
29 MAY 2011 - 112.9kgs
10 MAY 2011 - 113.3kgs
1 MAY 2011 - 114.9kgs
  • 23/4/11 Fill #21 ~ FILL 0.2ml inserted by Jane Wilkinson-Tancock (6.5ml in 10ml band)
23 APRIL 2011 - 115.9kgs
1 APRIL 2011 - 115.5kgs
1 MARCH 2011 - 117.4kgs
1 FEBRUARY 2011 - 117.8kgs - I only weighed in because its the 1st of the month but YAYAYAYAY!!!!!!!
31 JANUARY 2011 - 118.4 kgs

  • 30 JAN 2011 Fill # 20 ~ UNFILL - 0.2ml removed by Jane Wilkinson-Tancock (6.3ml in 10ml band)
  • 29 JAN 2011 Fill # 19 ~ FILL 0.5ml inserted by Jane Wilkinson-Tancock (6.5ml in 10ml band)
26 JANUARY 2011 - 119.0 kgs
24 JANUARY 2011 - 119.5kgs
12 JANUARY 2011 - 120.0.kgs
15 DECEMBER 2010 - 119.2kgs
15 NOVEMBER 2010 - 118.1kgs
21 OCTOBER 2010 - 118.4kgs
19 OCTOBER 2010 - 118.7kgs
08 OCTOBER 2010 - 119.2kgs  Down 2.8kg!!!!!!!!!!!
01 OCTOBER 2010 - 122kgs - 5mls in my band.
  • 26 JULY 2010 Fill # 17 - Emergency UNFILL 1ml removed by Jane Wilkinson-Tancock (5mls in band)
  • 24 JULY 2010 Fill #16 - 3mls inserted by Jane Wilkinson-Tancock Fluid was measured and with the fill I now have 6mls in my band meaning more had been lost during bad fill in January 2009 than previously thought. 
24 JULY 2010 18 stone 12lbs (264lbs)
01 JULY 2010 18 stone (252lbs)
05 MAY 2010  17 stone 9lbs (247lbs)
08 APRIL 2010 17 stone 6lb (242lbs)
  • 3 APRIL 2010 Fill #15 UNFILL 3ml removed by Jane Wilkinson-Tancock (4ml in 10ml band) Total rest of Band from 1/6/2010 until 14/11/10 (for future reference should I need it, 5mls in my band = no restriction)
14 DECEMBER 2009 16 stone 8lb (232lbs)
30 NOVEMBER 2009 16 stone 11lb (235lbs)
21 SEPTEMBER 2009 16 stone 13lb (237lbs)
  • 20 SEP 2009 Fill #13 0.5ml added by Wendy @ Weightloss Surgery Group - Total in Band 7.5mls
22 JUNE 2009 17 stone 1lb (239lbs)
  • 21 JUNE 2009 Fill #12 0.2ml added by Wendy @ Weightloss Surgery Group Total in Band 7mls
08 JUNE 2009 17 stone 8.5lbs
20 MAY 2009 17 stone 0.5lbs
14 FEBUARY 2009 16 stone 4
  • 14 FEB 2009 FILL#11 UNFILL by Wendy @ WLSgroup - remove 0.7ml by Wendy @ Weightloss Surgery Group (total in band 6.8ml)
02 FEBRUARY 2009 16 stone 6
  • 01 FEB 2009 FILL #10 by Wendy @ WLSGroup - 0.5ml (total in band 7.5)
18 JANUARY 2009 16 stone 9 Total loss 31.5lbs
  • 18 JANUARY 2009 FILL #9 by Wendy @ WLSgroup - 0.5ml (total in band 7mls as some loss due to bad fill  with a lot running down over my tummy)
15 DECEMBER 2008 16 stone 6
05 OCTOBER 2008 16 stone 8
  • 05 OCTOBER 2008 Fill #8 by Wendy @ WLSgroup - 0.7mls (total in Band 7mls)
07 SEPTEMBER 2008 16 stone 2
  • 07 SEPTEMBER 2008 Fill #7 by Wendy @ WLSGroup - 0.3mls (Total in band 6.3ml)
24 AUGUST 2008 15 stone 12
  • 24 AUGUST 2008 Fill #6 by Wendy @ WLS group - 0.5mls (Total in band 6mls)
10 AUGUST 2008 15 stone 8
  • 10 AUGUST 2008 Fill #5 UNFILL by Wendy @ Weightloss Surgery Group - 1ml Removed (Total in band 5.5ml) BIG MISTAKE!!!!!!!!! For future reference, what I needed was advice on smaller portions, not to force myself to eat and about 0.2 out to settle my band.
23 JUNE 2008 15 stone 9
19 JUNE 2008 15 stone 11 (hol weight gain in Malta 5lbs)
19 MAY 2008 15 stone 6
16 MAY 2008 15 stone 7
12 MAY 2008 15 stone 10
21 APRIL 2008 15 stone 12
14 APRIL 2008 15 stone 13 and 1/2
11 APRIL 2008 16 stone 1
  • 5 APRIL 2008 FILL #4 WLSgroup Harley Street, 0.5ml (6.6ml total)
22 MARCH 2008 16 stone 2
*****UNDER 16 stone 3******

20 MARCH 2008 16 stone 4

07 MARCH 2008 16 stone 5

03 MARCH 2008 16 stone 8

25 FEBRUARY 2008 16 stone 11

18 FEBRUARY 2008 16 stone 12.5

15 FEBRUARY 2008 16 stone 13

11 FEBRUARY 2008 17 stone 3

  • 10 FEB 2008 FILL #3 Weighloss Surgery Group - London 1.0 ml (6.1ml total)

30 JANUARY 2008 17 stone 4

14 JANUARY 2008 17 stone 4

  • 13 JAN 2008 FILL #2 Weightloss Surgery Group - London 0.6ml (5.1ml total)
07 JAN 2008 17 stone 7

12 DECEMBER 2007 17 stone 5

28 NOVEMBER 2007 16 stone 9

21 NOVEMBER 2007 17 stone 4

15 NOVEMBER 2007 17 stone 3.5

14 NOVEMBER 2007 17 stone 6.5

12 NOVEMBER 2007 17 stone 5.5
  • 9 NOV 2007 SURGERY #2 Correct Disconnected port
  • 9 NOV 2007 FILL #1 (during theatre) Dr. Dillemans - Brugge 4.0ml (4.0ml total)
7 NOVEMBER 2007 17 stone 12

31 OCTOBER 2007 17 stone 9

23 OCTOBER 2007 17 stone 5.5

25 SEPTEMBER 2007 17 stone 3.5

18 SEPTEMBER 2007 17 stone 5

11 SEPTEMBER 2007 17 stone 6.5

7 SEPTEMBER 2007 17 stone 9.5

29 AUGUST 2007 17 stone 11

24 JULY 2007 16 stone 11

16 JULY 2007 16 stone 13.5

18 JUNE 2007 16 stone 6


16 MAY 2007 16 stone 3

14 MAY 2007 16 stone 6

8 MAY 2007 16 stone 4.5

30 APRIL 2007 16 stone 4.5

23 APRIL 2007 16 stone 8

16 APRIL 2007 16 stone 6.5

9 APRIL 2007 16 stone 7.5

2 APRIL 2007 16 stone 8

26 MARCH 2007 16 stone 9.5

19 MARCH 2007 16 stone 10.5

5 MARCH 2007 16 stone 13

26 FENRUARY 2007 17 stone

19 FEBRUARY 2007 17 stone 5.5


5 FEBRUARY 2007 17 stone 11.5